Recently I've begun asking myself the really tough questions.

Who am I?
Why am I here?
Who let the dogs out?
Are you going to eat those fries?
If a train leaves Chicago going 60 miles an hour and another leaves Portland going 45 miles an hour where will they meet in a firey ball of death?
How can I eat cheetos and not get all that orange crap all over my keyboard?
Won't you be my neighbor?

I'm expecting to get answers, but my magic 8 ball isn't helping. I suppose i shouldn't use one I stole from the pool hall.